Trying to pull through. Trying to hold on. That’s not me. I am pulling through and holding on tightly. However, my life is similar to the mess that is on my table right now. I keep telling myself if I can clean it up, my life will be together. My life is just so messy right now. I just need to allocate time for myself and those around me. It might be tough but I will try to cut things out of my life like I don’t need. I think this is the reason why I woke up late today. I think I needed that time to think about my life. I need to think about how to gather myself together. I don’t know if I can finish gathering my life together by 6:30 tonight. But I will try my very best. I finally think I have the motivation to pull myself out of this crap. GO CLEAN!
Before I think grades meant a lot to me, I could possibly lose sleep over a grade. Maybe it’s because of time or things that have happened to me or whether I value other things in my life. I did pretty bad on the midterm for Chem (40%) probably my lowest grade ever. But it’s okay, I am just determined to do my best on all my other midterms and finals. I don’t think this one thing can phase me out. I will come up stronger and mightier!
At times, I feel exhausted, without energy to go on. But some sort of magic power that is quite unexplained give me the strength to carry on. It’s times like these that makes me sure why I am here. Sure, I’m here at Cal to receive an education but what will my mark be? At times, I don’t want to say why I’m here is due to fate but at times, is there any other way to explain it?
Life seems to guide me along the way to lead me to something completely different. It’s crazy that I get to be a part of a new era. A new program. I get to be along the ride. To see a friend who has full faith in me, to give me the honor of defending their baby, no other words can describe the magic power that keeps me going.
For now, I have no time but for those that I truly care for. What lies ahead of me, I’m still unsure of. But in the meantime, I hope to do the best of what I have now.
Amidst the address on unemployment, the middle class, and his other promises, this stood out to me in the President’s State of the Union message today as of ~26:15. Haha.
I remember when I decided I wanted to be a teacher: In the 6th grade, I saw a TV ad for maybe a tutoring program or something. I forget, heh. There was a father who was telling his son all these plans he had for him as a doctor, hopes for him to get into medical school, etc. The son said to his dad: I don’t want to be a doctor, I want to be a teacher.
The dad said: Why don’t you want to be a doctor? They get paid more..etcetc
The son confidently responded: Well, without teachers, who will teach those doctors to become doctors?
Andddd, I was sold.
Come sooner, March. (via japanesecurrency)
Through my trip in Vietnam, I thought through a lot of things in life over. At times I think am I too young to be thinking so far ahead? Am I just overthinking things? But through this trip, I learned age don’t mean a thing. I hold fate within my own hands. Who knows what will happen tomorrow but I will be prepared if that tomorrow will come. But for now, I’m simply just me.